NEPO BABIES: Broke Too Often!

By Dr. David Edward Marcinko MBA MEd

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Nepo babies often go broke due to a mix of financial mismanagement, lack of resilience, and the illusion of inherited success. Their privileged upbringing can mask the need for discipline, adaptability, and long-term planning—traits essential for sustaining wealth.

The term nepo baby—short for nepotism baby—refers to children of celebrities or influential figures who benefit from family connections to launch careers, especially in entertainment, fashion, or media. While these individuals often start with significant advantages, including wealth, fame, and access, many struggle to maintain financial stability over time. The reasons are complex and rooted in both personal and systemic factors.

First, many nepo babies lack financial literacy. Growing up in environments where money flows freely, they may never learn budgeting, investing, or the value of money. Without these skills, they’re prone to overspending, poor investments, and unsustainable lifestyles. Lavish purchases—designer clothes, luxury cars, expensive homes—can quickly drain even sizable inheritances if not managed wisely.

Second, the illusion of guaranteed success can be dangerous. Nepo babies often enter industries where their family name opens doors, but that doesn’t guarantee longevity. Fame is fickle, and public interest can fade. If they don’t develop their own talents or work ethic, they may find themselves unemployable once the novelty wears off. This overreliance on family reputation can lead to complacency, making it harder to adapt when challenges arise.

Third, many nepo babies face identity crises and public scrutiny. Constant comparisons to their successful parents can erode confidence and create pressure to live up to unrealistic expectations. Some rebel by distancing themselves from their family’s legacy, while others try to prove themselves in unrelated fields. Either way, this struggle can lead to erratic career choices and unstable income streams.

Fourth, fame without privacy can fuel destructive habits. The entertainment world is rife with stories of young stars—many of them nepo babies—falling into substance abuse, reckless behavior, or toxic relationships. These issues not only affect mental health but also lead to legal troubles and financial loss. Without strong support systems or accountability, it’s easy to spiral.

Finally, inherited wealth can disappear quickly without proper estate planning. Trust funds and inheritances may be mismanaged or depleted by taxes, lawsuits, or poor financial advisors. Some nepo babies assume the money will last forever and fail to plan for long-term sustainability. Others are exploited by opportunistic friends or partners who take advantage of their naivety.

In contrast, those who succeed often do so by acknowledging their privilege, developing their own skills, and surrounding themselves with trustworthy mentors. They treat their inherited platform as a launchpad—not a safety net—and work to build something lasting.

In short, nepo babies go broke not because they lack opportunity, but because opportunity without discipline is a recipe for downfall. Wealth and fame are fleeting without the grit to sustain them. The lesson here isn’t just about celebrity—it’s a universal truth: success inherited must still be earned.

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INHERITANCE: Disclaimers

DEFINITION

“Show Me the Money”

By Staff Reporters

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In some situations, an inheritance might complicate an estate and add to the estate tax burden.  If there are sufficient assets and income to accomplish financial goals, more assets are not needed. A disclaimer may be useful.  This is an unqualified refusal to accept a gift or inheritance, that is, when you “just say no”.  You have decided not to accept a sizable gift made under a will, trust or other document. 

When you disclaim the property, certain requirements must be met:

  • The disclaimer must be irrevocable;
  • The refusal must be in writing;
  • The refusal must be received within nine months;
  • You must not have accepted any interest in the property; and
  • As a result of the refusal, the property will pass to someone else.

The property passes under the terms of the decedents will, as if you had predeceased the decedent. If the filer of the disclaimer has control, the property will be included in the disclaimant’s estate and can only be passed to another as a gift for as an inheritance. The intent of the disclaimer is to renounce and never take control of the property.

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The “Die-Brokers”

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Results of an HBSC Survey

By Rick Kahler CFP® http://www.KahlerFinancial.com

Rick Kahler CFP

In recent ME-P columns I reported on a survey done by the financial services company HBSC that found only 59% of US parents intend to leave their children an inheritance, the lowest of the 15 nations in the survey. The fact the US is last came as no surprise to me. What did surprise me was that 59% seemed high.

My Average Clients

My average client is someone who has saved over one million dollars. I am guessing that less than 2% of them have any intention or goal of constraining their current lifestyle in order to maximize their kids’ inheritance. Consuming their last penny of savings about the time they take that last breath is their spending plan of choice. There is even a name for these folks: “Die Brokers.”

If they did a good job of planning for retirement, however, most Die Brokers will leave something behind. Almost all of these I work with intend to divide what remains equally among their children. The point is that leaving an inheritance just isn’t a priority or a goal that constrains their current spending. As a side note, I rarely see any intention to leave any significant portion of their estate to charity.

The Survey

Why did the survey find such a high number of parents who intend on leaving their kids an inheritance, as compared to my observations that almost none intend to? My experience is that most people have a money script of, “Good parents should leave something to their children.” It is similar to another money script of, “Good parents should pay for their children’s college education.” These are seen as things “good” parents do. My hunch is that when most respondents answered the survey question, they let their money script do the talking, rather than their true intention.

The Explanation

Still, this does not explain why US parents intend to leave their children less than parents in any other country. One reason could be that more parents in other countries have money scripts that it’s necessary to leave their kids an inheritance.

One of the most common themes among my affluent clients is a desire to see their children “make it on their own.” Over 90 percent of these clients are first-generation wealth builders, meaning they didn’t inherit their money but accumulated it from saving, investing, or building a business. They value hard work and frugality and feel leaving a large inheritance to a child is more hurtful than helpful.

First Generation Millionaires

Many of these first-generation millionaires also feel accumulating wealth in the US is very attainable with hard work, discipline, and frugality. This is not the case worldwide. In many countries, it doesn’t matter how hard you work or how frugal you are, confiscatory taxes and oppressive regulations insure that those people not fortunate enough to be born into money will never have a chance to become affluent. The only way to have a comfortable net worth in many countries is to either inherit it or work for the government.

Sadly, the US is closer to adopting a model that makes accumulating wealth increasingly difficult. I can’t name a politician currently campaigning who advocates lowering income taxes on wealth builders. Yet I can name scores who are running on increasing taxes on “the rich.”

staitns572x0

Assessment

Affluent parents in the US may soon begin to feel that, without an inheritance, their children may never have the means to get ahead. If more US parents begin believing this, we will probably see increasing numbers intending to leave money to their kids. The money script of “Good parents should leave something to their children” might become the truth.

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On Parents’ Inheritance Excuses

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An Estate Planning Follow-Up Discussion

By Rick Kahler CFP® http://www.KahlerFinancial.com

Rick Kahler CFPPreviously on this ME-P, we explored three fears that stop adult children from talking with parents about their estate plans, even though such conversations could greatly benefit both generations.

These are: “It’s none of my business,” “I don’t want them to think I am greedy,” and, “It will ruin our relationship.”

Parents Fear, Too!

Children aren’t alone in their fear of approaching this topic. Most parents are just as reluctant—and for the same basic reasons. In my experience, parents’ biggest reasons for not talking with kids about legacy intentions are: “It’s none of their business,” “If I share financial information, they will take advantage of me,” and “Talking about money will hurt our relationship.”

Let’s look at each of these:

“It’s none of their business.” This is certainly true, unless you’ve made it their business. If you name a child as an executor of a will, a successor trustee of a trust, or an agent in a Durable Power of Attorney, you have made it that child’s business to know your business.

Shared Decision Making  

To throw a child into suddenly having to make financial decisions in your best interest without knowing what they must manage, where assets are held, and what your wishes are is unfair to both you and your child. Any time you put someone in a position of authority in any of your estate documents, it’s essential to carefully go through the document with them and to disclose details of the assets they will make decisions on. Start with showing them your financial statements, the contact information of your trusted advisors, and a listing of where you hold all your accounts.

If you feel you can’t trust a child with such information today, then why do you feel you can trust them as your agent or executor tomorrow? If you don’t trust a child, you’re better off to name a bank trust office or trust company to these positions.

Bank

“If I share financial information, they will take advantage of me.” This fear may be justified if your child has a history of taking advantage of you. If not, they probably aren’t going to start now. Preparing a child for an inheritance is not only prudent, it’s also a loving act of kindness you can give your child.

Sudden Money

I have worked with several families where children had no idea of their parents’ net worth. In every case, it was much higher than the kids ever imagined. Suddenly, they learned they were about to inherit hundreds of thousands or millions of dollars in various investments they knew nothing about. I witnessed these heirs try to cope with a plethora of emotions and money scripts, in addition to needing to learn the mechanics of managing a portfolio of investments. Without proper preparation, it’s not uncommon for what parents intended as a loving gift of wealth to turn into a destructive force of misery.

“Talking about money will hurt our relationship.” Parents are just as terrified to have money conversations with their kids as kids are afraid to talk with them. And no wonder—it’s parents who teach kids the no-talk rule in the first place.

Parental Wisdom

As parents, you can exercise the wisdom of age and begin the family money conversations. It may be helpful to have the first meeting with your financial planner or estate attorney, or engage the help of a financial therapist. You might be amazed to find that talking with your kids about money in a straightforward and healthy way can actually help your relationships.

Assessment

Do your kids a favor and break the no-talk rule. It’s a gift to both generations.

Conclusion

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Children and Inheritances

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The Last Money Taboo?

By Rick Kahler CFP® http://www.KahlerFinancial.com

Rick Kahler CFPTalking about money is taboo in the US. If you don’t believe me, next time you’re at a social gathering ask everyone these two questions:

1. “What was your taxable income last year?”

2. “What is your net worth?”

Well, it’s not a recommended way to make new friends.

The Money Taboo

The taboo on money conversations can cause real difficulties when it extends to families. My experience as a financial planner suggests most families in the US have a “no-talk” rule around money. While a lot of family members know each other’s earnings, fewer know family members’ net worth. Even fewer have asked about their parents’ estate planning.

Many don’t intend to ever ask.  A blogger who calls himself the Financial Samurai wrote: “I never want to have the inheritance talk with my parents unless they initiate the conversation.”

Based on the responses to his article, he isn’t the only person holding this opinion. Most children recoil at even the thought of asking their parents about the particulars of their estate plans.

None of My Business

In my experience, the most common reasons for not talking to parents about their inheritance plans are these:  “It’s none of my business,” “I don’t want them to think I am greedy,” and, “It will ruin our relationship.”

Why Not Ask?

Let’s look at each of these reasons:

1. “It’s none of my business.” It’s true that parents have no obligation to disclose their finances and estate plan to their children. Yet it could quickly become your business if you are named as an executor in their wills, a successor trustee in a trust, or an agent in their powers of attorney. Asking whether you are designated as any of these roles is totally reasonable. If you are, then knowing the particulars of their estate plan and finances would be helpful for you to know. It is such a reasonable request that, if your parents are not willing to discuss the details, you may be best served asking them to name someone else.

2. “I don’t want them to think I am greedy.” If you’ve had your hand out to your parents most of your life, asking them how much you’re going to get when they kick off may not evoke a loving response. However; if you have never asked your parents for money – or – if you have asked for money and have paid them back; then you probably don’t have much to worry about! If you approach the topic from the standpoint of wanting to be fully prepared to carry out any duties bestowed upon you, I seriously doubt your parents will suddenly think you’ve morphed into a greedy, money-sucking leach.

3. “It will ruin our relationship.” One of the strongest money scripts around talking about money is that doing so will permanently harm a relationship. The Financial Samurai wrote, “I hate thinking about money and family because so often money tears relationships apart.” While money issues can certainly tear apart a relationship, so can abusing alcohol, sex, drugs, work, power, and a host of other things.

Mature Woman

Assessment

What I’ve seen is that keeping secrets about money is more harmful to relationships than talking about money. When the no-talk rule is in effect, family members make up their own stories about what is real. Those stories are rarely true, and the assumptions around them can cause misunderstanding and mistrust.

Being the first to break a family’s “no money talk” rule isn’t easy. Yet having the courage to start money conversations can be a service to the whole family. In my experience, it ultimately leads to better estate plans, more trust, and stronger relationships.

Conclusion

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On Inheritances by Country

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Spending an Inheritance

By Rick Kahler CFP® www.KahlerFinancial.comRick Kahler CFP

Stroll through a retirement camping resort or pass an RV on the highway, and you might see this bumper sticker:

“We’re spending our children’s inheritance”

No Joke

Apparently, this isn’t a joke. A December 13, 2013, article in CNN Money reported on a recent survey by the British-based international financial services company HSBC which asked more than 16,000 people in 15 countries about their estate plans. The US ranks last in the percentage of retired parents (56%) that intend to leave money to their kids. This is significantly below the 15-country average of 69% and far below the leading percentage of 86% in India.

US Rank

The US also ranks sixth in the amount of money ($177,000) that parents expect to pass on. This is behind Australia ($501,000), Singapore ($371,000), the UK ($234,185), France ($233,699), and Taiwan ($191,039).

No doubt there are many reasons for the country-by-country differences in what parents expect to leave their children. These may include differences in cultures, beliefs about family responsibilities, and attitudes toward charitable giving.

Contributing Factors

Other contributing factors, however, are differences in countries’ economic strength and tax laws. In a December 13 interview with The Australian, Graham Heunis, the head of retail banking and wealth management for HSBC Australia, credited some of the large inheritances there to the country’s unbroken 22 recent years of economic prosperity. Australian household wealth grew 7.6 per cent a year over the past decade, making it one of the richest nations per capita in the world.

Heunis also said, “In markets like the UK and US, inheritance and estate tax may cost heirs upwards of 40 per cent of an inheritance. With no inheritance tax in Australia, it’s no surprise the value and proportion of inheritance among Australian retirees is exponentially higher than the rest of the world.”

A Good Thing

It’s refreshing to see that accumulating and keeping wealth is still looked upon as a good thing in some countries. I doubt it’s a coincidence that most of those countries have strong economies, similar to what the US enjoyed in the past.

According to the 2013 Index of Economic Freedom, Singapore and Australia, the top two countries for inheritances, are two of the only three countries considered to have “free economies.” (The third is Hong Kong, where the average amount parents expect to pass on to kids is $145,943.) The US, considered the third top “free economy” in 2000, now sits at tenth as a “mostly free economy.”

Survey

This survey is not good news for baby boomers hoping to retire on inheritances from their parents. According to CNN Money, “About two-thirds of U.S. respondents said the inheritances they receive will at least partly fund their retirement, and 10% said they will rely on their inheritance completely to retire.”

If two-thirds of middle-aged Americans expect substantial inheritances, but only about half of elderly retired parents expect to leave inheritances, somebody is going to be disappointed.

Still, for those, like the majority of baby boomers, who are unprepared for retirement, every little bit helps. While an inheritance of $177,000 won’t put anyone on Easy Street in retirement, it could pay off a home mortgage or, if invested wisely, generate a monthly income of $450 for life.

inheritance

Another Problem

One last problem for potential heirs, of course, is that just because parents expect to leave an inheritance doesn’t mean they will be able to do so. Medical expenses or other unanticipated costs might well eat up parents’ resources during their lifetimes.

Assessment

Ultimately, relying on an inheritance for your retirement is never a wise move. It’s far wiser to use your own resources, start retirement planning early, and build your own financial security.

Conclusion

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On Inherited Money

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The “money scripts” of inheritances

By Rick Kahler MS CFP® ChFC CCIM http://www.KahlerFinancial.com

Rick Kahler CFP“I’ve never seen money passed from one generation to another in a manner that actually benefited the recipient.”

When a psychologist said this to me several years ago, I was dumbfounded.

Many parents, like some doctors, scrimp, save, and sacrifice so they can “leave something to the kids” with the intention of doing them good. It’s hard to accept that inheritances may actually do harm instead. Most of us have money scripts that don’t support this idea.

Money Scripts

Typically, I used to hold several money scripts around inheritances. One was that leaving money to your children is a loving thing to do. Another was that parents should always leave their money to their children. A third was that anyone who received an inheritance would invest it wisely, using only the earnings to improve their lives.

Today I know those money scripts were not universal truths. I have more understanding of the problems involved in giving money away in a manner that is beneficial to the receiver. It isn’t as easy as I once thought.

Seed Money?

Many parents envision inheritances for their kids as “seed money” that will be used for the health, education, and welfare of their offspring for many generations. Research shows that is rarely the case; instead, inherited wealth does not last long. Missy Sullivan summarizes some of the research in “Lost Inheritances,” a Wall Street Journal article published online March 7, 2013. According to this article, 70 percent of those who receive an inheritance of any size spend it all in their lifetimes.

http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424127887324662404578334663271139552.html

For the 30 percent that do have something left to pass on, 70 percent of their kids also blow everything they get. That means by the end of the third generation, 90% of the money originally passed down is gone.

While it’s easy to understand how an inheritance of $10,000 may evaporate, it’s difficult to understand that inheritances in the hundreds of millions evaporate just as quickly. How is that possible? Is the average American just incompetent at managing money?

The Research

According to Sullivan, a study done by the Williams Group found that poor investment decisions were not the culprit. About 60 percent of large inheritances disappeared because of a lack of trust and communication between family members. Another 25 percent of the time, money evaporated because the parents failed to prepare the next generation to handle their impending inheritance. Poor investment advice and high fees were the cause in less than 15% of cases.

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Money

Options

If more high net worth parents knew that only 10% of their hard-earned estates would be around at the end of their grandchildren’s lives, I wonder if they might do a few things differently.

One option would be to address the two biggest issues—lack of communication and preparation for heirs—head-on during their lives. Parents wanting their money to benefit their kids could engage the services of a financial therapist who could help the family address their communication and trust issues long before they pass on their wealth. Preparing their children to manage wealth and use it wisely would be the best way to increase the odds of making an inheritance a blessing rather than a burden.

Another option would be to secure their own retirement, then forget all the scrimping and saving and just have fun blowing the money on themselves.

Still another option would be to give their wealth to worthy causes during their lifetimes or upon their deaths.

Assessment

This would leave the kids to make their money by ingenuity, hard work, wise money management, frugality, and a little bit of luck. The same way, in fact, their parents did. Are medical professionals any different?

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